I have been sleeping like shit lately. Last night I woke up and remembered a part of a movie that I don’t remember the name to… Someone told the girl to figure out what kind of eggs she likes. Scrambled? Sunny Side up? Over Easy? and she went into the kitchen made all the different types of eggs and figured out what one she liked the best. This decision was hers to make, not her boyfriends, not her mothers, but hers.
I fell back asleep and woke up again with a quote stuck in my head that I saw earlier on the previous day. “People are people, and sometimes we change our minds.” This seems like it was plastered in neon and lighting up my bedroom wall.
I can change my mind. I can loooove scrambled eggs for 20 years, start my own scrambled egg cooking class, teach future generations how to create the perfect scrambled egg and then one morning wake up and decide I don’t like eggs at all. I stop everything that I created for 20 years because I changed my mind. This sounds powerful and it truly is, but what about all those people that I connected with while I loved scrambled eggs? I had made amazing friendships and history with these people. What happens when I don’t like eggs anymore? Some of these people back away and watch for a while to see if they want a friend who doesn’t like eggs, some are hurt and walk away, some come forward and tell me they don’t like eggs either and some stick around because eggs never mattered in the first place.
I never liked when people changed their minds. It rocked my world. I had opinions and statements and sarcasm. I took it as a personal attack against myself. How dare you? This has been one of the hardest lessons I have had to learn. That you can change, and its ok. That I can change, and its ok. I can change something that I loved 2 days ago and hate it today. I don’t have to worry about what people think of me and my decisions. If I know I am following Gods will for my life, I can never go wrong. That doesn’t mean I am going to floating around in this pink cloud. It means that I will be hurt by people and their opinions. I will grieve the loss of the ones who walk away. I can love them unconditionally. I will cry and feel the closing of a season. I also will open my eyes to the new possibilities. I will wait for the new people God will bring into my life to walk beside me, teach me and I will give my time to recreate these friendships over and over.
You find God in the people who are always changing. They are challenging you to look at yourself and find Gods will in your life. They are your teachers and the ones God has placed in your care. Love them.
As for the egg decision… the jury is still out.